Most families with teenage children at home are overcome with nostalgia when the Christmas holidays approach. They would never have imagined that they would miss so much standing in long lines with their children to deliver the letter to the Royal page and speak with the Three Wise Men, the adventures at home to hide the gifts well and not be discovered or the school festivals that lasted. all afternoon where we had to listen to Christmas carols that were somewhat out of tune.
It is true that the Christmas holidays, when children are small, are exhausting and stressful, but they are also magical, tender and extremely exciting. No mother or father ever erases their child's face from their memory when they discover the tree full of gifts on Christmas Day or Three Kings Day, or when they see how the camels have drunk all the water and eaten all the bread they were given. had left.
When adolescence arrives, Christmas at home changes a lot. The young man no longer wants these dates to arrive to receive his toys or decorate the tree, but rather to rest after a long first school term and meet his friends to go shopping or go out to party. Gone are the family plans to go see the city's Christmas lights, ice skating, afternoons dedicated to decorating, writing a letter to their majesties or learning the Christmas verse to recite it in front of uncles or grandparents.
It will be very normal for the teenager to show little interest in celebrating Christmas with the family and find the long after-dinner meals of family celebrations very tiresome or boring. Adolescence is the period of development where young people need to spend as much time as possible with their peers, sharing hobbies and confidences, and vacations are the best time.
Families must understand that teenagers need to celebrate these holidays in a very different way and that they cannot spend all the celebrations giving orders to their children: “Behave well when the guys I know you come home”, “dress differently than they do”. to think that you don't have decent clothes” or “tidy up your room, they will come in to see it and I don't want them to think that we are messy.” Some phrases that, far from young people paying attention, will only create constant conflicts in the home. If families want to enjoy the holidays with tranquility and harmony, they must understand that they will need to live these days at their own pace.
Tips to enjoy Christmas as a family with teenage children:
- Be interested in the plans he already has planned with his friends and show interest when he explains how important they are to him. Suggest an activity that might seem attractive to him to do with the rest of the family one day during the Christmas holidays: go see a movie or theater premiere, discover a new restaurant in the city, practice some winter sports or visit some city with a theme park. If parents take their tastes or interests into account and manage to surprise them, it will be much easier for them to want to enjoy this quality time together.
- Involve him in the organization of the parties at home: ask him to help you prepare the Christmas Eve dinner menu; Let him come buy gifts for other family members or help decorate the table in his own way. Parents must convey that their presence and involvement is very important for the rest of the house.
- Make schedules more flexible during these winter vacation days. The teenager will need a lot of sleep to regain her energy. Parents can agree in advance with him on the days he should be eating or dining at home with the rest of the family and the time he should return when he goes out partying with his friends to avoid conflicts.
- Make sure that lunches or dinners with uncles or grandparents do not become an uncomfortable place for him. The teenager who feels questioned or lectured will show little interest in sharing time with the family. Avoid ridiculing him or embarrassing him by talking about his low grades, mistakes, or his romantic relationships. And let him when the celebration is over he can go to his room to be quiet.
- Understand that, although a teenager wants to spend most of his time with his friends, it does not mean that he has stopped loving or caring about his loved ones. You have to empathize with his new needs, interests and desires. He must feel respected and understood; This will strengthen the bond between parents and children.
Fathers and mothers must understand that, although their child has grown, it does not mean that they have stopped needing daily affection and unconditional support.
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