It sounds simple, and it is: author and parenting expert Nicola Schmidt advises annoyed parents to confront their child with just one important sentence.
Frankfurt – Raising children can probably be many things: fulfilling, sometimes easier, sometimes more challenging, maybe even frustrating. According to author and parenting expert Nicola Schmidt, it is completely natural to occasionally reach your personal limits because of your children. In these moments, it is important to deal with the situation correctly. Four simple words can work wonders.
By the way, it has been scientifically proven that parents have a significant influence on the psyche of their children.
Parenting expert recommends four simple words when parents and children clash
On social media, the author shared a very brief piece of advice for parents: “Tell your child you love them once a day. Unless they’re really getting on your nerves. Then tell them twice.”
According to Nicola Schmidt, this is based on an experience from her own childhood. As she explains in the article, her mother often said to her: “Child, you are really getting on my nerves today. What’s wrong? I think I have to tell you: I love you!“
About the parenting expert
Nicola Schmidt herself is the founder of the project species-appropriatewhich aims to support parents in raising their children with courses, books and community activities. According to the information on the website, the project is “science-based and uses evidence-based research findings.” Schmidt has already published several non-fiction books on the subject of raising children, including “The Parent Compass.” This serves as the basis for the entire project.
Four “healing” words in child-rearing: Expert reveals what’s behind them
It was only much later that she realized how “healing” these words had been for her as a child. Children often reflect the emotions of their parents. When your own stress level is high, you pass it on to the child and get it back. In order to get out of this dynamic, it is therefore not very helpful to give the child the feeling that they are being stressful and “not functioning”.
The expert also learned how to communicate frustration properly while raising her own children. “When I started to say to him instead, ‘Ugh, I find things between us really stressful today! Come here, I really need to tell you: I love you!’ everything changed,” says Schmidt. In this situation, you become a team again much more quickly and work together again instead of against each other. It is important to be lenient with the other person in that moment. That applies in both directions.
Psychologist Svenja Taubner reveals the mistakes many parents make and what can have “traumatic consequences”. (nz)
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