Around the thirteen years he world changes abruptly and arrives the adolescence mixing all kinds of feelings and emotions. This stage of life is one of the most difficult.because in a short time they occur large number of physical, psychological, emotional and social changes. It's a complicated period, for which we parents are not prepared. On any given day, the beautiful boy or girl who yesterday told you: “Mommy, I love you! You are the best mom in the world! Suddenly he sees you with a look of antipathy, displeasure and even reproach. There are no goodbye kisses and without being able to avoid it the words slide mercilessly: “and why?”, “I don't want you to accompany me”, “I'm bored”, “you don't understand me”, “I'm old now”, “don't go through my things”, “my friends' mothers are not like you”, “you never believe me”, “one day I will leave the house”, “you don't love me”.
Suddenly, everything worthwhile for them happens outside the home; far, far away from parents and family. Parents become tyrants and friends brothers. Their whole world is friendships and there is an excessive need to feel admired and valued in the groups to which they belong. childhood is overthat stage in which they are intimately linked to the home and difficulties begin to communicate with parents. That is because They don't know how to identify very well what they feelthey don't understand what is happening, because they are losing their safe world, they feel confused: They are not children, but they are not adults either..
Start the puberty and the hormones They roam freely, physical changes and self-discovery occur; Your body is a journey of transformation. The childish features disappear and the mirror reflects an unknown image that stretches, fills with new lines and shapes; changes are part of its precession: mind and body are a constant boiling. They are finding and building their own identity, which is why every word of rejection or demand produces a very intense reaction in them. They live in the short term, there is only the here and now, the fervor of the moment. They are learning to make decisions, they claim their independence, the establishment of new relationships and the assumption of new responsibilities emerge. The psychological evolutionary process is the same, but each adolescent expresses it according to her temperament.
Our young people need adults who can help and support them in this transition stage. It is our mission to prepare them for life, guide them, lead them and help them develop their qualities and abilities; the talents they possess, not the ones you would like. The role of parents or guardians is a two-sided coin: love and authority. On the one hand, the affective function, they must feel loved, approved, positive support is essential for the emotional development of the minor and, on the other hand, education that translates into establishing norms, terms, responsibilities and authority. We are the adult who sets the limits, therefore, the first person on the list of rivals.
We must understand that overprotection or rigidity is not good for adolescents, there must be a balance, parents must be clear when setting goals and act accordingly if they are not met, just as adolescents must have defined rules regarding to obligations, schedules, departures, etc. Let's try as adults not to infantilize them, take their opinion into account, reinforce their strengths, motivate them to their autonomy. It is a difficult process of mutual adaptation, your boy or girl is growing and learning to have his or her own opinion and criteria and you have to understand that the relationship with parents changes.
Life gives you twelve years of unconditional love from your children and then comes adolescence, that crucial stage in everyone's life; You just need patience, because, you know what? It heals with time.
More from the same author:
#teenager
