He began to write in private. At night, while her barely two-week-old daughter slept on her chest, with the notes application on her cell phone. She did it as a form of therapy, in secret, to try to calm the voices that had been tormenting her since Laia came into the world in July 2023. “I saw that other mothers were very happy and I, however, did not stop crying every time. day. I was terrified of leaving the house, of taking her to the pediatrician, of someone touching her, of paparazzi. They followed me… My gynecologist suggested that I write down those thoughts every time I had them.” The former Cristina Pedroche (Madrid, 35 years old) would have kept that improvised diary your Instagram account, where more than three million users follow her, but she did not feel prepared to endure more hate. “They have always given me shit, it doesn’t surprise me, but when they get involved with things related to the girl or motherhood it hurts me a lot,” says the popular presenter during the conversation with EL PAÍS. She never thought that those confessions, and what she learned during pregnancy — “Women have to be oppositional” — would end up shaping Thanks to fear (Planet), her literary debut and the pages that, as she reveals, she would have liked to read to feel a little less alone.
At the time of the meeting, Cristina Pedroche is far from having recovered from a complicated psychological postpartum. She still cries almost every day, but she feels lucky to be able to verbalize her fears. “I don’t know how many taxis I’ve cried in already. Also, I know that when I go to work, Laia is sad and I can’t…” she says while her tears corroborate that her happiest stage is, paradoxically, also bittersweet. Her vulnerability emerges: “It’s very hard because on top of that I hate giving grief, but my life is falling apart.”
It was his friend Ángel Martín, with whom he shared the set in I know what you did…, the La Sexta program that launched her to television stardom at the age of 21, who encouraged her to listen to her editor’s proposal and use her speaker to help other mothers who, perhaps, can identify with her story. This is her first book promotion interview and she doubts her ability to offer many more. She recognizes that she is intense, perhaps a consequence of having grown up with Camela songs, but her wounds remain unhealed: “I have realized that my problem is not with motherhood, but with media pressure. A few days ago they took some photos of us at the airport and they took the girl out. I don’t take a single step out of it, I have never sold my private life, I only ask for respect. “I want people to think that I haven’t had a girl.”
If Manuel Jabois already wrote in 2016 that “half of Spain has its own ideas about how Pedroche should want, what clothes he should wear and how he should celebrate his wedding”, now that she is a mother, half of Spain has its own ideas about how she should love his daughter, what diet and education he has to offer her and how he should present her to the media. Her exhaustion has made her rethink her professional future: “Every day, several times, I think about getting away from television. But I’m screwed because, even if she disappeared, there are people who are always in the spotlight. Belén Esteban, for example, will always be Belén Esteban. Sometimes I would like to go back, I think I wish I hadn’t done the casting for I know what you did..., but of course, I still would have never met Dabiz [Muñoz, su esposo y premiado chef]”.
Pedroche, who deals with thoughts of being a “bad mother,” undergoes therapy to avoid dumping fears on her child: “I want her to be a brave aunt and I am going to give her all the love and tools to be happy, but sometimes I think what a shame to be Pedroche’s daughter. I can’t go with her to the park because they keep taking photos of us. If she had been born in another family, maybe she wouldn’t have the house we live in, but she could go out more.”
The Vallecana admits that Laia, unlike her parents, was born in a privileged environment and is blunt when asked how she plans to transfer to her that class consciousness that she has always displayed. “I’m going to give my daughter all my love, but not all my money,” she replies. “My parents still live in my neighborhood, I go there a lot and see all those things.” Pedroche started working at the age of 16, folding shirts in a Bershka and, given her lack of affection for parties and nightlife, on weekends she worked as a waitress. The young woman who years later would turn her presence at the New Year’s Eve bells into an audience phenomenon, defines herself as a “perfectionist and little ant”: “I want to teach my daughter that things take work.”
The price to pay for his success has been high. The backpack, he says, weighs too much. In recent times they have divorced her on different occasions, the exclusive of her pregnancy was leaked before she could even communicate it to her parents and her arrival in Laia’s world was known just a few hours after it occurred. “Before she was a sociable aunt who told all her fears to people and now I consider myself very closed. I don’t have friends, I don’t tell anyone anything,” she recalls. Her secrecy is such that she has rejected million-dollar offers to monetize Laia’s image, at a time when exposing her children has become, according to experts, the best business in the world. influencers. “When you upload your baby to social networks, you engagement It goes up and that attracts brands, but it’s a circle of shit. You don’t know in whose hands those photos are going to end up and, if I am very jealous of my private life, Dabiz won’t even tell you anymore,” she adds.
Wear a maxi dress that combines lace and air print boho and curly hair with a lot of volume; the same look with which a few minutes before appeared in zapping, a program in which she has reduced her presence to two afternoons a week to prioritize the care of Laia, who she only shares with her husband and mother. “Before she wanted to be the best all the time. When any format that I saw that Antena 3 could buy came out, I sent it to my bosses telling them that I could do it very well. Now I don’t look at anything. I want to continue being a presenter and succeeding in each project, but I am in no hurry,” she concludes.
Motherhood is a revolution that has overwhelmed her and, although she confirms that she will continue presenting the Chimes if the network heeds her requests – “I want to change everything, starting with the balcony” – her priorities are already different: “I consider myself a mother of ten and a professional ten, but I have realized that I cannot do everything and, if I have to choose, logically I will stay with my daughter. With the other… I will do what she can.”
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