She was 11 years old when, thanks to a journalist uncle and a video that went viral, the Yemeni Nada Al-Ahdal managed to escape a forced marriage. After her sister attempted suicide after being forced to marry, also as a child, she decided to ask for help. «There were three days until my wedding. I didn’t say anything and ran away. I made the video, it went viral, and they only protected me because the media put pressure on the Government. After surviving, I wanted to help other girls and raise awareness about the consequences of child marriage,” Nada explains to ABC. A decision he made when he realized that «We know more about the dangers of checking your cell phone while driving than about forced marriages». According to some NGOs, one occurs every three seconds around the world. In Catalonia, the Mossos prevented 17 last year alone and helped victims of two others that had already taken place. In the rest of Spain there were five. The main obstacle to eradicating this scourge is that, unless the minor herself or her environment asks for help, it is very difficult to detect..
For this reason, Nada, at 22 years old, has settled in the United Kingdom where, in addition to studying International Law, he has founded a foundation that bears his name to reach out to other victims. «We should never ask a girl to run away without first providing her with a safe space.». So far, her organization has helped 64 minors and has also given free English courses to another 600. Education is the only way, the activist emphasizes. And the fact is that “fathers are guilty but also victims,” because they surrender to a practice, ultimately human trafficking, as a “form of control over women.”
Al-Ahdal insists on the importance of awareness. «If families receive sufficient education they will support the eradication of child marriage. Just like mine ended up doing, and now they refuse to marry my younger sisters. “That’s what it’s about, warning about the consequences.”
The young Yemeni woman is aware that her case is exceptional. «My sister tried to say no and no one believed her. He suffered for months. My aunt accepted it. She got married at the age of 14 and ended up taking her own life. For me to say that it was not the only option,” he says.
His uncle was – and continues to be – by his side, and that video he shared on YouTube and which was echoed by media around the world did the rest. «Looking back, I should have had protection, not been on the news [con sólo 11 años]but it was my only option. “I don’t want children to have only one option,” he says.
Along with Nada, another survivor, and also an activist, Payzee Mahom. At 16 she was forced to marry a much older man. It happened in London, where he lived. Her family took her to try on dresses in bridal shops – she was still so petite that they were all too big for her – they also hired a wedding planner, but no one raised the alarm. “No one thought there was anything wrong with this,” the young woman noted yesterday.
Payzee escaped from the union with a complete stranger two years later, due to another dramatic event: Her sister decided to flee another forced marriage and was murderedin what is known as an ‘honor crime’, when the relatives themselves kill the woman who rejects the arranged union. «The only reason I ran away was because my sister lost her life. This is the destiny of many girls,” she warns. And it happens “also here”, as was the case, not only in Africa or Asia.
Both Nada and Payzee participated yesterday in a conference on forced marriage in Barcelona. An event organized by the United Nations and La Roca Village to make this scourge visible, in which the founder of Nuevo Hogar Betania, Begoña Arana, also participated. Her association was born in 2011, after she herself saw how boats full of pregnant women arrived in Spain. Victims of trafficking, sexually exploitedand others who were also fleeing forced marriages in their countries of origin. «We are in a very complicated situation, because we receive many women and girls. “I cling to being the speaker for those who do not have the capacity to reach audiences that can stir consciences,” he stressed.
«Systemic change»
Arana, Princess of Girona Social Award 2019, confirms a growing reality. «In the end, as a first world country, we are participating in this deception of criminal networks that torture lives. In addition to working on the recovery and protection of these women, together with the security forces and bodies, we have to get involved to achieve systemic change. To do this, beyond the statistics, he indicated, “we must focus on the capital ‘t’ of trauma, so difficult to erase” from each of the survivors. «We are facing a transnational crime. “It affects everyone and we have to fight it as a community,” he urged.
That is the reason why Nada and Payzee – the latter, through tears – tell everything they suffered to anyone who wants to listen, with the sole objective that their stories will not be repeated again.
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