Well, look at me, sitting in the easy chair with the ears in my head. It is early, that is to say, very early, at six o’clock. The sun has not yet risen, but I want to be there live to hear how Flanders awakens. Does the sound differ from the morning show of the Flemish alternative music station Studio Brussel, always called StuBru by the insiders, and I can count myself to that after a week of immersion, does the sound differ essentially from a Northern Dutch wake-up program? In these times of profiling, rebranding and tuning to the supposed listener, is the music still worth hearing, or has it degenerated into a meat-nor-fish that nobody can afford? We will hear.
I’ve known StuBru since it was founded on April 1, 1983. It was just a coincidence that I heard the first broadcast. I was just playing on the radio when I came across a very strange song. The text read: “Rendezvous, but the measure is full and my head is finished.” Those two lines were sung fifty times in a row to a minimalistic melody. The rhythm was fast, it was of this typical fresh new wave that we heard more often then. The singer apparently left no doubt about it, she meant what she sang. I knew that song, it almost started a civil war in Belgium when the jury of experts chose it as the Belgian entry for the Eurovision Song Contest, which was held in Munich earlier that year. Very daring, sending such a song, I thought, it was actually no less than a cheerful provocative grin, yes, maybe even a small middle finger to all the neat old-fashioned entries. And now I heard it on the radio. „Rendezvous, but the measure is full and my head is finished.” Pats, it was over and there was Studio Brussel, the fresh, new alternative music channel that from that day on showed me bands that weren’t played anywhere else.
Slightly provocative
The reception in Bussum, where I lived at the time, was bad. That improved somewhat when I moved to Utrecht in 1985. It was light radio that they made there, they were so much happier than with us. The deejays talked so much more carefully than with us, it was palaver what they did, here, in the north, they were more likely to make announcements. Here they expelled, there they smeared.
Also read: Deutschlandfunk is radio without chatter, chatter and funny jingles
The tone was set well with Rendezvous, the song represented the kind of absurdism and satire that has permeated the programming ever since. It had that lightness, that slightly provocative that we lacked.
There is Fien Germijns, from the morning show that bears her name, many programs of the current StuBru are named after the presenters. She is going to provide us, she promises, with a mandatory shot of goodwill. Because it doesn’t look good, does it? The consultation committee will meet today to discuss new corona measures. Mouthmasks for young children, mandatory working from home for 3 days, dismissal of healthcare staff who have not been vaccinated, Fien can imagine that this affects our mood. Vincent from Aalst appt, he is the most optimistic person in the fan base, but he is not in the mood today. Fien gives him a boost with music, she plays a song by The Vaccines, a band from England that already had that name long before the pandemic.
Fien is nice. She has a humble, masculine sidekick who laughs softly at the jokes the listener sends her. “We have an obligation to house poultry, together with your chickens in quarantine. Some speak of a tokdown, a coqblock and the hashtag #freethechickens is already being used.”
Then she speaks with Iris, she works in a residential care center for the elderly and is not vaccinated. Iris is about to burst into tears, she will soon lose her job if the measures proposed by the consultation committee continue. She hasn’t been vaccinated because “it just doesn’t feel right.” Fien remains calm about this weak argument from someone who exposes the people she works with to such high risks. “But what are you going to do,” she asks, “if you’re really going to be fired?” “Then I’ll take the shot,” whispers Iris.
There is a quiz. Fien selects something from the newspaper and two candidates have to guess how far from their bed it takes place. Today’s question is about a brothel where people can get vaccinated. Candidate 1 estimates that this is 280 km from his bed, candidate 2 says 800 km. He won, the brothel is in Vienna.
Brothels have a hard time attracting men, so they can be pricked there, in the hope that they will also come and make a poeperke. Women are also allowed to come, yes, they will receive a voucher of 40 euros after the injection for the fitness center located next to the brothel.
Vincent from Aalst texts again, it’s getting better after his first cup of coffee, he’s really starting to feel like it. Me too. But then she suddenly turns that annoying Kanye West, luckily that’s not just that. He has bought a house in Belgium, in Wijnegem. He was there, says the local police commissioner, held at gunpoint by officers, because he and a few others were walking down the street in strange outfits, with masks on. When West took off his mask and revealed himself, the officers were unimpressed. The name Kanye West, who can now be called ‘Ye’, didn’t mean anything to her at all.
Dance tracks as community service
StuBru is still worth a listen, despite the fact that they have made the station more accessible by making the music mix a bit more mainstream. But two weeks ago I couldn’t listen for 72 hours, then they worked out a list of the best dance tracks, it’s community service to have to hear that, dance tracks are for the club, not for the radio. In the evenings and at the weekend I usually get my share of new unknown music. A few hours Stijn Van de Voorde and I am up to date again. Snail Mail, Kidlake, Andy Shauf, Badly Drawn Boy, that work.
I just don’t come across the absurdist satire anymore. Oh, how I laughed at studio Kafka at the time, by Kamagurka and Herr Seele. They played a skit on a highway where a serious accident had involved a van full of Cliniclowns. The clowns immediately got out to entertain the wounded. Because that distracted the motorists on the other side of the road, an accident also took place there and a van with Cliniclowns was also involved in that accident.
The Studio Brussel app offers a solution here. It contains a number of podcasts with broadcasts from the rich archive. If it comes to a lockdown again, this app will make it a very fun one.
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