Savor every moment, the key to away anxiety and hypervigilance

I often meet people incapable of Enjoy the moment. They are people who live everything with anxiety, such as agony, restless and hypervigilantes.

The sense of duty It takes on the maximum prominence in these profiles and moves away everything that has to do with enjoyment and enjoyment.

When I analyze these profiles more calmly I find two common characteristics. On the one hand, they are people smart and sensitive With a great capacity to anticipate the futurewhat will happen or the consequences of their actions. On the other hand, they are people who have suffered a lot. Sometimes because of abuser parents, for a cruel and abusive couple or by a teacher who has made his life impossible.

These people have had to adapt as they have been able to live and one of the strategies who have developed has been to be alertanticipate the movements of the people who had close and limit to survive.

When one has to survive, even only on emotional level, enjoying the background.

Suffering, especially as a child, leaves you some sequelae. One of them is to not be able to enjoy anything and live in a agony constant.

To some extent, that reaction or strategy is normal and understandable since it was a resource that served you as an ally to avoid abuse, pain and suffering; But maybe now it is no longer necessary, nor is it only useful.

One believes that agony is normal and believes that it is not so much, but when I do a psychometric study and share the results people are surprised at how tense they are and of the repercussion in his quality of life, Mental health and Emotional well -being.

We need to objectify our pain, have a valid reference, a measure that allows us to locate. Fortunately we have that measure and is very revealing.

Work that hypervigilance It is not excessively complicated. With becoming aware, in many cases enough. That, often, is the first step to adopt another style of relationship with oneself and with life, healthier, more tight.

The sugar test

I like to make the simile with excessive sugar consumption. Simply present some analysis to be aware that you are hurting yourself when taking so much sugar. With hypervigilance the same thing happens, it is enough to see your psychometric results to become aware that you need to have a healthier and more relaxed relationship with yourself and with the world.

I encourage you to enjoy the moment. Savor life. Surely your ex made them pass canutas, surely that incompetent professor touched your self -esteem and had to be hyperalert, surely that toxic mother took you to a state of continuous hypervigilance. I don’t doubt it. But it already happened, you don’t need to live everything as an agony, you don’t need to go three steps ahead.

You can relax and enjoy the process, you can taste life and you can create your environment of trust Where to enjoy is an essential element.

You have already suffered a lot. You deserve to enjoy everything you have.

You can discover other tips from Tomás Navarro (@Tomasnavarropsi on Instagram) to put limits to those people who hurt us in their work ‘Your red lines’ (Zenith/Planet) and help the little ones manage emotions with the book ‘Rita and the gold shell’, who has written with his wife, Nuria Pablos. And besides, you can read here other articles by Tomás Navarro in ABC Welfare.

About the author
Tomás Navarro

Psychologist, consultant and writer. He is the author of the books “emotional strength”, “Kintsukuroi,” Wabi-Sabi “,” I am like that “and” You are stronger than you think “, published in Zenith and translated into several languages. He collaborates with media and has taught conferences in more than twenty countries. He writes, performs his company sessions and serves individuals in the mountain, pedaling, walking or skiing in the heart of the Pyrenees, where he resides.