The turtle escaped!

Dear Martin:

I start with a milestone in the shirt, and it is that the Mexico-Argentina match had more to do with neurosis and melodrama than with sport.

Since the World Cup began, this was The Party, to such a degree that we have talked little about other things, including Richarlison’s acrobatic goal against Serbia, worthy of the Cirque du Soleil tents, or Neymar’s excruciatingly swollen ankle in that war of the Balkans (the great actor of the faults did not deserve to be reached in this way by reality).

Many sets have happened, but a single game caused us to bite our nails.

A few years ago a friend died and his wife discovered at the funeral that he had had a daughter out of wedlock. To get out of his confusion, she gathered the three best friends of the deceased, among whom was me. With amazing composure he asked the dreaded question: “Why didn’t he tell me?” The most eloquent of us answered: “He wanted to do it, but he didn’t find the opportunity.” “He didn’t find the opportunity in twelve years?!” the widow replied.

Well, the other parties in Qatar have been daughters out of wedlock, which is hard to talk about. The decisive thing was to know if Mexico would be able to retire Messi from the World Cups. The task was difficult because it has been 18 years since Mexico beat Argentina. We couldn’t appeal to our power, but we could take advantage of the fact that the Albiceleste had been hit. Our vitamin was his anguish. Lautaro, who plays to show off his haircut, went out onto the field as if he had been sent to the worst hairdresser and Messi had the eyes of someone who sees nowhere. Was that emotional crisis enough to beat them?

The only thing that could favor us was Argentina itself, which was risking its life and reputation; as for us, integrity depended on having no reputation. The war we could win was one of nerves.

The difference between Serbian and Mexican soccer players is that the Serbs try to kill you and the Mexicans don’t let you live. Mexico played for the match not to happen, convinced that soccer is what others do. The 0-0 seemed magnificent. Argentina was infected and the first half was one of the most horrendous in the history of the World Cups.

We Mexicans have enthusiastic ways of annoying the neighbors, like singing rancheras at three in the morning. Unfortunately, our team didn’t think about such nuisances, but about the simple destruction of the game.

Fulfilling what was expected from the beginning of this correspondence, Mexico left much to be desired. He hasn’t scored a single goal; the serious thing is that he has not even discovered the formula to try it.

A genius from Lionel Messi unlocked the game. A low shot, at an angle, from outside the area, like the many that he has converted in his historic career and that Memo Ochoa was unable to stop despite being dressed as Spider-Man.

Messi offered a brushstroke of greatness in a game to forget. The hope that he will continue in the World Cup includes the vast majority of Mexicans, ready to applaud his executioner.

As his thing is to avoid victory (both someone else’s and his own), Tata took the most offensive of ours off the field, the chucky Lush. A white flag gesture.

We were looking for peace when the second goal came, a great shot by Enzo Rodríguez.

Mexico deservedly remains in the basement of his group. Unfortunately, we didn’t even serve to make Argentina look like the team that has been credited with so much merit, and that seems far inferior to its possible rivals in the second phase, the French, who advance with the pace of champions.

When Sampaoli did not call Higuaín to the albiceleste in 2018, Diego said: “The turtle escaped him.” That’s how clumsy the coach seemed to him.

Mexico needs a miracle to continue in the World Cup, but it has a coach who loses his mind.

The complete correspondence of Caparrós and Villoro during the World Cup in Qatar

subscribe here to our special newsletter about the World Cup in Qatar