Suspected criminal offenses Sibling violence is a silent phenomenon, and bruises are easily turned into “ordinary squabbling” – Aggression regulation problems should be addressed early

A 12-year-old boy is suspected of attempting to murder his little sister in Eastern Uusimaa. Experts say there is too little talk of sibling violence as a phenomenon. However, serious violence is rare.

Last At the end of the week, Finland was shocked by an exceptional case: approx A 12-year-old boy is suspected about the assassination attempt of his 5-year-old little sister in Eastern Uusimaa.

According to police, the boy has said his parents do not value him like a little sister.

This is certainly not the only thing found in the background of the act. This is how the docent of forensic psychology evaluates Taina Laajasalo and Deputy Chief Physician of Child Psychiatry Anne-Mari Borg. They both deal with child violence in their work.

“From the experience of jealousy, there is a tremendous distance to something so tragic happening,” says Laajasalo.

According to Borg, it is rare for a child to hurt his or her sibling systematically and intentionally.

“I don’t think favoring parents alone drives such an extreme act. I assume there are other background factors as well. Each child’s background is unique. Violence is influenced by the child’s internal factors and the environment in which he or she has grown up and what has happened in his or her life, ”says Borg.

Laajasalo works at the Department of Health and Welfare as a leading expert and studies violence between children.

Borg, on the other hand, works as an assistant chief physician in the area of ​​child psychiatry at Tampere University Hospital, where he also treats violent children.

Studies According to him, there are often individual or environmental risk factors behind children’s violence.

The abusive child himself or herself has often experienced or been exposed to the violence herself. Violent behavior in a child may also be due to factors related to the child’s development or psychiatric disorders.

According to Laajasalo, behavioral disorders can be associated with difficulties in controlling aggressive behavior.

“For some children, it can be quite planned, and they use violence judiciously to achieve someone’s goal. It’s quite rare, but it can happen, too, ”he says.

Borg has found in her clinical work that violence is a partially learned pattern of behavior. Children who abuse their siblings have often experienced violence in their families or been violently bullied, even at school.

Many have problems regulating emotional life and behavior. Significantly less serious violence can also be caused by a child’s loss of consciousness or emotionally cold features.

“For example, children with differences in neuropsychiatric development also often have more challenges in understanding social situations, tolerating frustration, and poor impulse control,” Borg says.

Anne-Mari Borg

He points out that the regulation of aggression is one of the most important learning tasks in human life. Children who are violent towards their siblings have often not learned to deal with disappointment, frustration, and difficult emotions in a constructive way.

Borg adds that sibling relationships involve a wide range of emotions, and even feelings of jealousy help the child develop in their emotional regulation. It is the parents ’job to help deal with difficult emotions, and to make sure no one is hurt.

“For children, these are skills to learn. If we are being treated by a child who is hurting others, we will start practicing our regulatory skills. The first goal of our work is to make everyone safe at home, ”says Borg.

Aggression regulatory problems should be addressed as early as possible. According to Borg, the prognosis is good if the child is helped before the age of ten, preferably before the age of eight. The prognosis deteriorates if violence begins to become an established pattern of thought and action.

According to Borg, it’s really worrying if a 12-year-old hasn’t learned to control his aggression and hurt his siblings.

“By the age of 12, it is desirable for man to have learned to tame his fists, and not to put into action his most damaging thoughts. If not, there is a problem. Whether there have been traumatic things in a child’s life or there is some fragility in his or her development that he or she has not learned those skills, ”says Borg.

“Still, I think even at that age, they’re still skills to learn. But if an injury or death occurs in the family, it is a great shock to the family and also has a lot of multiplier effects. It is also a great tragedy in the life of the author. The author and his family now need the closest possible care. It’s hard to recover from that. ”

Laajasalon and, according to Borg, sibling violence is not very uncommon, but little is talked about and little studied.

In her work, Borg encounters parents who may tell her that there is “ordinary squabbling” between children. It soon becomes clear that there have been bruises in the squat.

Borg points out that there must be zero tolerance for violence against all family members at home. Sibling violence is one form of domestic violence and should be taken seriously, he says.

Even the large-scale salon believes that sibling violence has been normalized to some extent.

“Violence doesn’t belong in any close relationship,” he says.

“It’s important that we talk about sibling violence as a phenomenon. At the same time, it is also important to remember that the act we are talking about now is extremely rare. The majority of the unpleasant acts and violence between the siblings is quite different from the case we are talking about now. ”

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