Poor boyfriend! One day he was married, and his ardent little wife had requested him a dozen times in the bed of love. The unhappy man was walking since he could not stand up. “Let’s do it again” -asked the insatiable bride. “But, my dear,” the exhausted heartthrob objected, “we’ve done it 12 times already. And do you want one more?” “What?” she asked, annoyed. “Are you superstitious?” “Something very strange is happening to me, young man,” that truck driver told me. “When I’m on the road, I’d like to be at home, and when I’m at home, I’d like to be on the road.”
I was a student at the UNAM Law School, and I arranged my schedule so that I finished my classes on Fridays at 10 in the morning. Then I would go to some road and ask for a ride to the drivers who passed by. On those trips I got to know countless cities and towns in our country. I stayed in shabby hotels with a worse life; ate in the markets or on the street. What I learned on those pilgrimages could not have been taught to me by any university. I knew about the comedy and the tragedy of living. And now what happens to that trucker happens to me. I am in my house and I do not want to leave it, because my wife has made it a paradise, but I hear the voice of the pilgrim and I cannot refuse her call. I spend more time outside my city than in it.
I have already said that I arrive at the hotel and they ask me: “How did it go?”, and I arrive at my house and they ask me: “And where does the gentleman visit us from?” I tell my wife: “It’s my job.” “No,” she replies. “It’s just that you like entertainment.” She is right. Don Ignacio López Tarso heard one of my lectures, and at the end he told me: “You are not a lecturer. You are an actor.” I felt that the great artist gave me a decoration. With the pandemic over, I’m back on the road. The week that passed I was in San Luis Potosí, in Mérida and in Monterrey. At my age, that is no small thing to say. I am in good health, at least as of this writing. Someone will say that it is a thing of the genes. I think it is rather a gift of that Mystery that has so many names, among them that of God. As long as he doesn’t order anything else -and I am under his orders- I will continue here. And there, and he there. This Sunday I was in Monterrey, at the International Book Fair.
I presented my conference “Unspeakable Confessions” there. I was assigned room C, the largest in the room. It was filled to capacity with a generous audience that with their applause and laughter gave me the holy sacrament of human kindness. At the end people stood up to applaud me, and then formed a long line for me to sign his books, a delightful task in which I spent more time than the duration of the conference. Saying “thank you” to so many good people who wrapped me in their affection is saying the obvious, but there is no better way to sum up my sentiment. The same goes for my publisher, Grupo Planeta, and for the Coahuilense Institute of Culture, which jointly organized my presentation. Now I am back at home, happy. When am I invited to travel again?…
A customary drunk, a miser and a lecher passed from this world to the other at the same time. Saint Peter received them and told them that he would submit them to a test to see if they had already overcome their sins. He presented the drunk with a glass of liquor. The drunk could not overcome the temptation and drank it eagerly. “To hell,” the apostle ruled. Next, in order to tempt the miser, he threw a gold coin on the ground. At once the lecherous man said with alarm to the greedy: “Don’t bend down to pick it up. If you do, we’ll both be lost.” FINISH.
LOOKOUT
By Armando SOURCES AGUIRRE.
“Jardín Zoologico” says the sign at the entrance.
There’s the giraffe.
Elephant.
The lion
The Tiger.
The gorilla.
The panda bear.
The monkeys.
The chimpanzee.
The Orangutan.
They all walk around the walkways, and look curiously at the cages.
Men are in them.
-How rare they are! An animal comments.
Answer another:
-Yes. And very dangerous.
See you tomorrow!…
MANGANITES
By AFA.
“. A new version of ‘Pinocchio’ will make Guillermo del Toro.”
They have been done in many ways,
all in a timely manner.
Here we have one:
the one who acts in the morning.
#politics #worse