The two normal people approach an urban photo booth, one of those automatic booths that steal a square meter from the wall so that everyone’s documents look shiny at the rate that the administration demands. The first normal person draws the curtain … polyester and occupies the only seat in the cabin. The second normal person is left out.
-All good? -ask.
“Well, yes,” answers the first person. Why would it be wrong?
-No reason. Is the seat good?
—Maybe tough.
—You know you can spin it, right?
—Turn around? So that?
—To raise and lower it.
—Ah, yes. It’s still a little low, yes.
—Then turn it up a little.
—Spinning, right?
—Turning, turning. Give it a whirl. But for the side that is.
—And how do I know which side is?
—If you end up on the ground, it’s the other one.
—No, yeah, but in case you knew.
-Well no.
—Well, I try and that’s it.
The first normal person stands up and leans towards the seat, turning it with his palm.
—I’m doing well, I think.
-Glad to hear it.
—When do I stop?
—When you see.
—Do I calculate by eye?
-Perfect. You sit down and if you see yourself in the mirror, you’re fine.
—Is there a mirror?
-Always.
—So many things, right?
—The normal ones.
The first normal person sits down again.
—What do you see? —The second normal person draws the curtain a little.
—Be careful, the light is coming in!
—But that’s when it’s the photo, right? —he replies, closing the curtain.
—Oh, sure.
—What do you see? —insists the second person.
—I see my chin.
-Only?
—And the mouth. And the nose.
—Not the eyes?
—If I want, yes.
—But are you normal?
—If I’m normal, not anymore.
—Well, you’re going to have to go down a little.
—Turn the other way around now, right?
-Yeah.
The first normal person lifts his butt a little and circles the seat twice, not bothering to get up completely this time.
—I think so.
—Do you see your eyes now?
-Yeah.
—And the chin?
-All.
—Well, nothing, you already have it. How do you have your hair?
—Well, I don’t know. How does it seem to you?
The second normal person draws the curtain again.
—I see you well.
—Only good or very good?
—Just fine.
-Better. I don’t want it to be too good. I like that it’s normal.
—Well you have it.
—And now what do I do?
—Pay, I think.
—Oh, of course, you have to pay. Close, then. —The second normal person obeys—. How much is it?
—Isn’t there a sign?
The first normal person steps forward and frowns, to facilitate focus.
—Five euros, four photos, it says; and seven euros, eight photos.
—How many do you need?
-Two.
—Well, with four you have it, right?
—I said to choose.
—To choose what?
—The two best. In which the hair is more normal.
—I think four are enough.
—Well, nothing. Are they worth tickets?
—Do you have tickets?
-No.
—And why do you ask, then?
—What do I know? For asking.
The average person tilts an old flip-top purse so the coins slide out.
“Well, you say,” he insists, raising his voice, “but it would be easier with bills.”
Insert three one-euro coins and one two-euro coin into the slot. When the last one falls, a high-pitched hum begins to sound. The normal person panics.
—Something sounds! What I do?!
—Sit down, run!
—Should I sit or run?!
—Look in the mirror!
—Which one?!
The first flash explodes.
—The one from before! The one with the chin!
—I think he already took a photo!
The second flash explodes.
-Relief!
—What’s going on in there?! Are you OK?!
-No!
The third glare blinds him.
—Wait, I’m coming in! Get away!
—Don’t come in!
—Let him come in?! I’m coming in, huh?!
The fourth flash flashes.
-Salt! Come on, let’s mess it up!
—Am I leaving safely?!
—Quickly, for the love of God!
The second normal person sneaks away as best he can and closes the curtain behind him. Nothing shines anymore, only the anxious panting of the first normal person can be heard.
After a few seconds, the slot finally outputs a strip of photos, still wet. In one of them, the normal person screams; in another, he looks to his left; In the third, she spreads her arms in fear; In the fourth, the two normal people form a blurry mass that covers the lens.
The first normal person snorts.
—Will this be valid for the license?
-I think so. You come out very well in this one. —He points to the second photo.
—I should have put in seven euros.
—Well, the same, but look at the hair.
—What’s wrong with the hair?
-Nothing. Nothing happens to the hair. The hair is perfect. Normal.
