Column | All electricity in Finland is consumed by electric cars and a couple of other observations

The electricity crisis has been a fascinating journey into the terms of energy production and the truths of social media.

Past winter has been painful for the electric heater. But it has also been educational. I have delved deeper into the fascinating terminology of energy production and at the same time got on a memorable journey to the ultimate truths of social media. I have learned at least the following things:

Wind power. Wind power is a reasonable way to generate electricity, as long as the power plants cover the entire country’s electricity needs even when they are not running.

Electric car. “Electric mixers” use more than 300 percent of all electricity consumed in Finland, and despite that, they can’t go further than a mailbox.

Olkiluoto. A Finnish place where a power plant will be built in 15 years around a cracked feed water pump, which after completion will either produce electricity or not.

Energy weather. Yay! Horizontal flight! Go ahead!

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Hydroelectric. Another reminder that everyone should be born Norwegian.

Cheap lessons. That moment when you wake up at three in the morning and the first thing you think is to put the jansson temptation in the oven and go to the sauna.

Firewood should be free.

Exchange electricity. A way to get semi-free electricity if you’re an engineer or live in a world with no clocks.

Firewood. What? Where? Is it for sale? I’ll pay what you ask and I’ll pick it up right away! I can pour myself!

Motti price. Firewood should be free, because trees grow in the forest and processing them into a form that can be burned is a nice exercise for the forest owner.

Electrical supports. A surgically precise and consistently executed precision operation, which pales in comparison to both the moonwalk and the Normandy landings.

Air heat pump. Judging from the concerns of various tipsters, Finns use air source heat pumps mainly to cool apartments heated by electric radiators and fireplaces.

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Small particles. A nostalgic scent that displaces either all or most of the breathing air in all small house areas in Finland.

The writer is HS’s news manager.

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