Ohne Orientierungshilfe ist es schwer, auf einer der großen Rasenflächen die Stelle zu finden, an dem der Angehörige, Nachbar oder Lieblingsmensch beigesetzt wurde. Die Baumgruppe oder eine bestimmte Zahl der Schritte, die man vom Weg aus zurücklegen muss, können den Besuchern der Urnengräber auf dem Frankfurter Hauptfriedhof helfen.
Von Weitem ahnt man nicht einmal, dass es Grabstätten in dieser parkähnlichen Landschaft gibt. Dabei haben die Gräber Steinplatten, doch sie sind flach im Rasen eingelassen. Die meisten sind ganz klassisch mit Namen, Geburts- und Todestag versehen, in Reihen angeordnet. Die Friedhofsverwaltung kann Auskunft geben, wo sich eines der inzwischen 10.000 Rasengräber befindet auf diesem größten der insgesamt 36 Frankfurter Friedhöfe.
Die Zeiten, in denen die Asche der Toten anonym auf dem „Feld der Ungenannten“ beigesetzt werden konnte, ist vorbei. Dort gab es für Besucher keinerlei Möglichkeit, die exakte Stelle im Rasen mit der Urne zu finden. „Anonyme Grabfelder gibt es bei uns seit zehn Jahren nicht mehr“, sagt Norbert Schlüter, der den Hauptfriedhof verwaltet.
Anyone seeking anonymity today can only do without a book-sized gravestone in the lawn. Anonymous burials were extremely popular for a long time, as they were the cheapest way to comply with the legal burial obligation. No gravestone, no slab, no cross. Just a small square of earth with a layer of grass that cemetery workers can drive over with a ride-on lawnmower.
Today, the main cemetery is mainly interested in so-called urn lawn graves, those lawn graves with a gravestone. They are chosen so that the funeral and burial do not cost too much money. Today, they are the most cost-effective form. Here, too, the only maintenance required is mowing the lawn. To make this possible, there is a requirement that nothing, absolutely nothing, is placed on the gravestones: no flowers, no figurines, no personal mementos. But it is evidently difficult for those who continue to live to follow this strict rule.
Even at the sites of anonymous burials, the bereaved had repeatedly ignored this contractual agreement, which ultimately led the cemetery administration to no longer offer this form of burial. If the cemetery gardeners have to walk the entire area, which is mowed weekly, to remove flower arrangements, small sculptures or even just a small wind turbine, the cemetery administration’s fee calculation does not add up.
Grave site as a connection for the bereaved
But it is not only in Frankfurt that it has become clear that the bereaved often misjudge how to deal with the death of a person. Other cities are also reporting that the trend is clearly towards urns rather than the traditional and therefore more expensive burial – in Frankfurt only one in four people are buried in a coffin, in Hamburg urn burials already make up 80 percent, and in Berlin even 90 percent. At the same time, however, relatives are increasingly wanting to have a grave that they can visit and leave a greeting.
“Death needs a place,” says Carsten Helberg, chairman of the Association of Municipal Cemeteries. Some members of the association say that the development of burial culture over the past three decades – especially since 2004, when the death benefit previously provided by health insurance companies was abolished – towards increasingly cheaper burials is a “wrong path.”
The question, says Helberg, is: “What is the final resting place of our relatives worth to us?” The cemetery administration in Frankfurt is also reacting to these trends. The lawn grave in the main cemetery now also exists in a form where souvenirs can be left. There are beds planted with perennials, lined with a paved border that serves as a storage area, and only then comes the lawn grave.
At the Ohlsdorf Cemetery in Hamburg, a memorial has even been created with the title “Thoughts of You”, where the name of a deceased person, or of loved ones who have been lost in whatever way, can be engraved. Demand is enormous.
The administration of the main cemetery also tries to meet the wishes of the people of Frankfurt, even though the number of people who die in Frankfurt but are buried outside the city is constantly growing. At the same time, it has to keep an eye on cemetery fees and the remaining costs for the city. More than ever, the city budget is being used to balance things out in order to maintain the main cemetery with its large, old trees as the largest green space in the city.
In order to draw attention to cemeteries as places of changing burial culture, the Cemetery Day has been held nationwide for more than 20 years, initiated by the Association of German Cemetery Gardeners. Since 2002, the city of Frankfurt has also taken part with the main cemetery. This Sunday, September 15, there will therefore be numerous guided tours, music, information stands and advice – all free of charge. Further information is available at www.friedhof-frankfurt.de to find.
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