A pair of elderly former fetishists who once actively explored their sexuality explained their decision to stop experimenting. The story of Elle, 58, and Jay, 56 published The Guardian edition.
Elle says she had been single for 18 years and was raising a 16-year-old daughter when she met Jay. She introduced him to the fetishes she had enjoyed in her youth, and over the first nine months of their relationship, the couple tried out dressing up, role-playing and bondage, eye masks and caning. However, after that, they decided to go back to basics: missionary position and kissing.
“We like to look at each other and kiss while we’re doing it. Eye contact is key. We pick up on a lot from each other’s facial expressions and voices,” says Elle. She believes menopause has increased her sex drive, and now she enjoys just making love.
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Jay’s story is different: his family did not encourage open dialogue about intimacy. “When I was growing up, I associated sex with disobedience. Maybe that’s why I developed a spanking fetish with Elle,” he said of his sexual preferences. He also added that he and his partner spent many hours studying the art of shibari, Japanese rope bondage, but had not returned to the practice in a long time.
After trying all of this, we both realized that the best sex for us is less experimental; 99 percent of the time, missionary is our main position now, because we like looking at each other. I’ll come over on Friday, and as soon as she gets off work, we’ll go to the bedroom. I’ll do one of Elle’s favorite things: shave her pubic hair. Then we’ll make love, spend the rest of the evening together, cook, and go back to the bedroom.
Earlier, sex coach Rich Yuzwiak gave advice to an older man who shared a long-standing fetish with his wife for the first time and was unexpectedly met with her approval. The author of the letter is 59 years old, his wife is 60, and he was always afraid to tell her that he dreamed of watching his wife have sex with another man, or trying group sex with her.
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