“Are you a virgin?” Leovigildo asked that unexpected question the night of the wedding to Kalentina, his new bride. Elle rejected the challenge. She angrily replied, “On a night like this, do you want to talk about religion?” Far be it from me the reckless idea of making Bragueto’s conduct ugly. People say that he is a man of profit, because he looks for it without having to work.
He courted Picia, a maiden who had already seen her April and May pass and who, moreover, was unattractive; she closely resembled Jack Elam, considered by some to be the ugliest man in American movie history. But Picia was the only daughter and universal heiress of her father, Don Rochildo, a wealthy man who, in addition to having millions of dollars and euros and owning an 80-seater jet and a 300-foot yacht, owned an apartment building in front of to Central Park, in New York, a chalet in Innsbruck, a villa in Tuscany, a five-star hotel in Paris, a casino in Las Vegas and a house in Saltillo, in the Golden Eagle neighborhood.
All this -especially the house in Saltillo- made Bragueto put Picia’s meager physical gifts in parentheses and think rather of what he would bring to marriage. He entered into courtship relations with her, and soon the preparations for the wedding began to be made, all on behalf of the girl’s father, grateful that his daughter would know the truth of the popular saying according to which “a man’s leg warms up more than 20 kilos of coal”.
But alas! Publius Siro said it well: Fortuna vitrea est: tum cum splendet frangitur. Fortune is made of glass: just as it shines, it breaks. A series of lousy deals caused Don Rochildo’s wealth to vanish overnight, and the unhappy man was left destitute, turned into a pet, that is, poor. Picia gave the unfortunate news to Bragueto. And he exclaimed: “Ah! I always knew that deep down your father never agreed to our marriage, and that he would do everything possible to separate us! He has succeeded!”.
The lecturer was speaking about the origin of the planet Earth. He stated, “At first it was all fire, but then it cooled down to complete inactivity.” “Look!” Mrs. Frustracia said to her neighbor’s seat. It even seems that she is describing my husband!”. Don Cucoldo told a friend: “Last night I had sex with my wife”.” Wow! commented the friend. You cuckolded half the town!” Father Alvino was considered the best taster in the region. His fame was legendary. On one occasion he said that the wine he was given to taste from a barrel had a metallic and leathery aftertaste. connoisseurs believed that there was no relationship between the two flavors, but when the barrel was empty over the months, a small key tied to a leather cord was found in its bottom.
It happened that a foreign winemaker wanted to see if Father Alvino’s fame as a great taster was indeed true, since he had been told that he did not even need to taste the wine: he could identify it just by smelling it. In the village tavern he blindfolded her and brought her a glass. The priest took it to his nose and without hesitation he ruled. “Red. Cabernet. Rioja. Harvest 72”. The visitor presented him with another wine. The great taster sniffed it and said, “Rhine White. Riesling. Vintage 81.” The astonished foreigner then did something unusual: he brought his wife’s midsection up to the priest’s nose. After briefly sniffing her, Father Alvino decreed: “Tall. Blonde. Blue eyes. 90-60-90. Vintage 2001. Light of conduct. And she’s not from my parish.” FINISH.
LOOKOUT
By Armando SOURCES AGUIRRE
STORIES OF THE CREATION OF THE WORLD
The Spirit never explained why the Lord created man.
He thought, although he didn’t say so, that without that creature things would have been better.
The Spirit also knew that there would be poor people in the world.
One day the Lord and the Spirit looked out to see the men who populated the earth.
The Spirit asked:
-Which are the poor?
The Lord answered:
-All.
See you tomorrow!…
MANGANITES
by AFA
“. They will make an anti chapulines law.”.
Unwelcome opinions
that here I transmit to the reader
they say it would be better
some anti-rat law.
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#politics #worse